We have all experienced some level of jealousy in our lives, however, when you are in a relationship, acknowledging these bouts of jealousy is very off-putting.
Jealousy is a universal feeling, so why do you feel badly when you experience it. It will be part of your relationships from time to time. Don’t deny it or you will not be able to cope with it.
Here are a few tips for dealing with that inevitable jealousy:
- A little jealousy can be good for you in small doses. Jealousy is sometimes a bit more than just coveting thy neighbor’s vacation house. Once your current relationship has begun to grow, you may show some twinges of jealousy when someone begins to pay too much attention to your mate. Recognize your jealousy and move on.
- Once you admit that your jealousy is normal, you should take a minute to talk about it with your partner. This will keep things out in the open and it is important to acknowledge your feelings. And that goes for both of you.
- If your bouts of jealousy become overwhelming, there are things you can do to deal with it. Make sometime to work out your jealousy. Set an appointment to write down your feelings. Be aware that this your time to work it out. By the time you have processed it and dealt with it, you will find that it just isn’t that important anymore. This only really works if you know 100 percent that you have nothing to worry about as far as your partner straying from you.
- Don’t set your expectations too high. Look at what you really value. Is it a simple flirtation that’s bothering you? Do you think that your partner should only smile at you? Should you know their every movement and thought? Not only does this set you up for disappointment, it can crowd out your partner and make them feel bitter and resentful.
- Look at your behavior, is it toxic? Are you constantly interrogating your partner? Or are you stalking them on social media? Or worse, have you hacked into their email or cell phone? This type of jealousy is definitely not healthy.
- Sometimes jealousy may be a sign that there is something going on. If you have been open and honest with your partner, you should be able to ask them if there is anything to truly worry about.
- Betrayal will not end you. One of the reasons people let their benign jealousy evolve into toxic betrayal is that they are afraid that a crumbling relationship will destroy them. If the thought of losing your love to infidelity feels like a punch to the chest, that’s normal. You are allowed those feelings, just know that you can survive the punch as long as you don’t let it knock you down.