Why You Need More than Just Love in a Relationship

Love in a Relationship

Relationships require far more than love to be successful.  Healthy dynamics involve an array of different aspect, one of which is love.  Here are a few more traits you need to be cultivating if you want a relationship that lasts and is fulfilling.


This must be the basis for any relationship.  Without trust, you may get caught up in a cycle of hurt, anxiety, anger, and shame.  This can be especially difficult for people who were lied to in the past or have a history of being hurt by others.  Working on building trust is essential to have a satisfying relationship.  This ensure both partners feel heard, respected and understood, while avoiding any miscommunications that could lead to arguments or worse.


Both partners need to be willing to bend to benefit the greater good.  No one is ever perfect in a relationship, and both sides must be willing to put in hard work.  Learning to comprise fairly helps you both weather any storm.  It allows you both to process how each may want different things, but you can still be truly to yourself and your needs.  By being strong individuals, you can learn to appreciate each other’s differences.  Working together, you can find a happy middle that satisfies the both of you, while still honoring your unique personality and needs.


Relationships require time and effort.  Showing patience and grace signifies to your partner that you care about them and sincerely value their efforts in your relationship.  Sure, there will be bumps along the way and some bumps will be rockier than others.  Things will be especially be difficult in the early days as you are getting to know one another and how you factor into the pairing.  Thankfully, as time goes on you both will get more comfortable and find a rhythm.


The basis of any relationship must be a sincere respect for each other.  Working to understand another’s mindset and needs are critical as it helps to foster intimacy, trust and understanding.  When you act compassionately, you signal to each other it’s safe to be authentic and vulnerable.  It frees you both from expectations and judgement, while preventing any fear of repercussions.  You are there for each other in good times and in bad.  You know the magic in relationships is in the little moment, like a hug, rather than huge gestures or promises like jewelry.

Prioritize yourself

Before you can love someone else, you must first value yourself.  Self-love teaches you what is important to you and how you desire to be treated.  Without it, you probably will have ample anxiety, fears, and doubts that can be deflected onto your partner or other loved ones.  When you view yourself positively you will know to your very core you are deserving of the time, attention, and affection from this other person.


Healthy relationships mean valuing the totality of the other person.  This includes their past, quirks, habits, goals, and mindset.  You don’t have to enjoy every aspect about them, but you must be okay with their flaws and work with them.  Never hold onto a grudge and work together to overcome any resentment to avoid more complex miscommunications in the future.  You can accomplish this by address problems immediately and ensure both parties listen to concerns.


Communication goes beyond merely talking, to being able to truly listen to each other.  Listening means letting the other person share without you waiting for your turn to talk next.  Taking this approach helps you address issues entirely and see the situation for what it is.  Pay attention to your body language, eye contact, and volume.  Sometimes it goes beyond what is said to the quiet subtle clues.  Be willing to hold hands, or gently touch each other’s back or thigh as an intimate cue that you are here for them and committed to the relationship for the long haul.


Mistakes will be made.  But how you react to them shows the health of your relationship.  Forgiveness shows your partner that you understand their short comings and are giving them the benefit of doubt to begin to correct any oversight.  It also helps you both to be open and honest about issues that are upsetting to you.  Then you can work together to create strategies to heal and solve the problem(s) at hand.


Be honest with each other with what is really going on in your life or a situation.  Share both the positive and the negative aspects to help you both grow as individuals and as partners.  Understanding concerns prevents resentments from taking root and causes future disagreements.

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