Relationship Addiction

Relationship addiction is most prominent in the early onset of any couple’s experience.  Why is it that so many people become addicted to each other without anything stopping them from doing so?  An early relationship can be like a drug that people need to survive.  The chemical reaction when two people are close together is very strong and can have lasting effects for weeks and months at a time.  Eventually, this reaction dies out. But when it is present, it can become quite an exhilarating experience to ever have in life.  

Many people view these certain times, in their newly formed union as the most memorable and the happiest times in their lives.  Love like this doesn’t come around very often and when the chance to experience it arrives, you should definitely make it happen.  No one knows for sure how it will last or how long it will last.  It is just their and the addiction to each other can be transformational.

Even though the feeling of addiction is present, it is just another form of clinginess. Attachment has its place in relationships, but it most be understood that this form of clinginess and it must be diminished over a certain period of time.  Too much clinginess when a union is forming can be detrimental if the full force of it is exceptionally strong. There is nothing wrong with having potent feelings for each other in the beginning, but just remember that over time, feelings do change and you have to change along with them. Not any kind of a distancing fashion, just the kind that allows you both to settle down and not be too aggressive as you once were.  

Let’s face it, there will come a time where the process of addiction between the two of you will start to die down and you need to be ready for those strong feeling to start to diminish.  This is normal and should not be taken lightly. Too much attachment can leave your partner to feel smothered and push them away further from you. You will need to calculate the correct response needed to balance out the clinginess that is present in your life.

There is no doubt that the addiction of love within a couple can be a feeling of almost obsession, like some type of euphoric drug that you want more and more of. So, what can you do to alleviate the conditions of addiction in your relationship without having too much of a negative impact?

Distancing:  If you can learn to effectively ascertain a certain level of close distance and appreciate that the both of you can spend time apart in a healthy way, while gradually getting closer when the time is right, will really help.

Stay Busy: You have things to do and so does he.  Make sure you get all of your things accomplished and stay active when you need to be.  He will do the same as well.  This will give you some time to make the heart grow fonder when you see each other again.

Be Spontaneous:  Don’t plan things over and over again like having a routine schedule. This will get boring and will leave the element of surprise totally diminished.  What’s the fun in that?  Make things up in the spur of the moment.  It makes life more fun and exciting when your not always scheduling things.

Stop thinking:  Constant thinking can drive you crazy so you need to start changing your thoughts to other things that can keep your mind busy like reading or working out.  It is quite successful and works very well.  Because constant thinking of the one you love may gradually change your positive thinking to negative ones that aren’t even happening in the first place. So, keep your mind busy with resourceful books and keep learning as much as you can on a daily basis.  

Your partner is not an object:  Stop portraying your partner like he or she is your possessive object of desire.  You don’t own anything and you need to make sure you don’t ever feel like you own them.  The idea of this alone can make you feel like you are the sole owner of the one that you love when this is never the case.  It is only so in your mind alone.

In any way you can, just be yourself and enjoy the time you have in the beginning because I can tell you right now that it will not last.  Embrace the moments you have with them because it will never come back. Sorry to burst your bubble.  Sometimes you can try to do things to keep your relationship alive as it was in the beginning as years pass by.  But, nothing will ever compare to that feeling you both had when the passion was so intense. Remember the times you both stayed up until the sun came up in the morning? Yeah, those days were unique and memorable so live it up and make it last as long as you can extend it for.  You will know when the time has passed.  Just don’t push it too much.  

Ohter forms of relationship addictions can be the obsessive kind that is quite negative in nature.  Remember the possessive feeling that some people have that I mentioned earlier?  This is one of the extreme feelings that often turns out not so good.  This is because one person is more obsessed or addicted than the other person.  When this happens, it is better to stay clear of such a relationship because the possession of the object of that person can really have a detrimental effect on their mental aspect. Not a pretty picture and I am sure you have seen movies about obsessive and addictive people that have no better things to do than follow the person they love to the ends of the earth.

What can you do if this happens to you?  Kindly let them know that it was great being with them, but you have other things you have to do.  Some people can successfully handle addictive people and most people cannot because they find that it can drain most of their energy and time.  Only you know how to proceed if you are ever confronted in such a situation like this. Your gut will always let you know how to proceed.  I would listen to it if I were you.

Leave a Reply